In Memory...

For me, today and this week are about remembering two people who were such an important part of my life and who unfortunately are no longer here.

First my Grandpa. Today would have been his birthday - a big birthday - his 90th! It has been 4 years since he passed away and I still miss him every day and especially on days like today. I miss the stories he told. I miss sitting with him on his front porch while he read his newspaper. I miss the daiquiris he made - the ones that started off as virgin daiquiris and then got stronger through the years! I just miss him.

I know I'm lucky that I had 27 years with him. I got to spend my childhood with my grandfather and then got to know him as an adult. I can only hope Rhea has the same opportunities with her grandfathers.

This week is also my Grandmom's birthday. I think back to her party just last year and how when it came time to leave, Rhea got sick. She had a fever and she just wasn't herself, but we went anyway (with a lot of Tylenol) because I think we knew it would be the last celebration we would share with her. And this week as I think about her, I think how grateful I am that we were there that day. How grateful I am that I got to know to my grandmother over the past few years when she went from living thousands of miles away to less than a hundred miles away.

It's sad to think that Rhea will never know these two people who meant so much to me. Two people who influenced my life in such different ways. But, as I write that I know that there is a connection there that cannot be explained.

Rhea's due date was 9/8/07 - grandpa's birthday. And I was admitted into the hospital on 9/11/07 - grandmom's birthday. In some ways, it's hard to believe these are just coincidences.

But, most of all, every time she wants to water the plants or dig in the dirt, I know she didn't get that from me. It had to come from grandmom. And every time I look into her blue eyes, I think what were the chances she would have blue eyes? She has two parents with brown eyes! They had to be slim and yet it's another connection she shares with my grandfather.

So, today as I feel sad, I know that Rhea is the living legacy of both of the people on my mind and that although she never met them, their stories and their influence on me will have an influence on her and will be part of her life.

So, while there are some tears today, there are also smiles. Lots of smiles.